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Episode 15: Stories about Lauren
In an episode that is heavy on story and a little light on hiccups, Justin, Juliana, and Justin's friend Lauren live through some difficult struggles that have a profound influence on them all. Bonus points if you can identify what connects the italicized subheadings together, and extra bonus points if you can make the connection with the title! Finally, I hope that someone out there can learn from, or perhaps even take comfort from this story. If so, it's been worth writing. --The Author
"Beauty queen of only eighteen..."
It was a crisp fall night three years ago, back when Justin was only a freshman struggling to find his place in the crazy world of high school. That particular night, the football team from Justin's school, Downtown High, was playing their arch-rival: Western. These cross-town games were no ordinary gridiron matches; everyone even remotely connected with either school took the game very seriously. In short, it was the apex of the athletic year for both schools. That year was Western's turn to host the game, but of course, most of the student body, families, and friends of Downtown High were there in force, making it a raucous occasion. More than three years later, his memory of the night was rather fuzzy, but Justin still remembered being rather bewildered by the crowd and the excitement.
Justin, now so gregarious, popular, and never lacking for friends, had been a very different guy three years earlier. Only over time had he developed into the magnetic personality that he was now. Though he had never been antisocial, the shy and meek personality that he had grown up with had left him almost completely overlooked in his freshman class. So it was that he had arrived at the big game with some classmates, only to have them run off with various groups of friends, leaving him completely alone, despite the crowd that was all around him. But Justin wasn't easily hurt, and if nothing else, he was very much a fan of the school team, so he settled down in an open spot on the bleachers, and watched as the game began.
The first quarter was about to end when Justin decided to take a break from the action. While on his way to find a warm drink, he happened to pass by Sandy, one of the guys he had originally came to the game with, who noticed him and motioned for him to come.
"Hey Sandy, what's up?" Justin asked when he was close enough to be heard over the noise of the crowd.
"Just hanging out with some old friends," Sandy answered. "Sorry about leaving you, did you find a place to sit with the other guys?"
Justin blushed slightly. "Not really, they all sorta left, too."
"Man, that sucks," Sandy replied, feeling a little guilty. "But hey, you should meet my friends here, they go to school here at Western, but they're still pretty cool anyway!" he laughed, turning back toward the people he had been talking to before Justin arrived. To his surprise, only one of them was still there. "Oh wow, where'd they all go?" he asked the one remaining girl.
She shrugged, "They went back to their seats, I guess. They said you'd catch up with them."
"Oh, I guess I will have to! But yeah, Justin, this is my friend Lauren Paige. Lauren, this is Justin Thomas; he's a freshman at my school."
Lauren greeted Justin with a shy smile. "Cool, nice to meet you."
"Yeah, you too," Justin replied. The first thing that he noticed about Lauren was her quiet, high-pitched voice. It sounded small and cute. She wasn't a small girl, however, standing only an inch or two shorter than Justin himself, and of average build. She had very straight, dark, shoulder-length hair, and hazel eyes that really stood out to him, for a reason he couldn't quite put his finger on.
Just as the pause in the conversation was about to get rather awkward, one of Sandy's other friends reappeared. "Come on, Sandy, we're about to score and you're missing it!" he said excitedly.
"OK, let's go," Sandy suggested. He and the other guy started back toward where they had been sitting, followed by Lauren, with Justin tagging along behind.
When they arrived, it looked like there wouldn't be any extra space for them to sit back down. But the group pushed a little tighter on the bleachers, and they were able to sit down: first the guy who had brought them back, then Sandy, Lauren, and finally Justin, who squeezed on at the end of the row.
While the game continued, Lauren and Justin talked a little bit. They were both relatively quiet, so they chatted only every now and then at first, but more as time went on. Justin learned that Lauren was a sophomore here at Western, although she was the same age as he was. They both had an interest in music - Justin was in a string ensemble at his school, while Lauren played the guitar quite well. "My boyfriend got me my dream guitar for my last birthday. That was the best gift ever!" she exclaimed.
Although they were enjoying their conversation, Justin and Lauren were still paying attention to the game, too. It was a tight, physical affair, with the lead changing back and forth between the two teams. Lauren was obviously a big fan of her school's team, and every time they scored or made a key stop, she made a point of teasing Justin about how much better her team was than his. It wasn't long before Justin got into the teasing act too, and by the fourth quarter, they were both having a great time.
Less than a minute into that final quarter, Western scored a touchdown on a fabulous 59-yard run, taking a 27-23 lead. The home half of the crowd, Lauren included, went wild, cheering and shouting with excitement, with everyone on their feet. Their team hadn't won the cross-town match in eight years, and even with fourteen minutes still to go, they were eagerly anticipating an upset. The crowd finally calmed a bit - and Lauren finally sat down - after the ensuing kickoff.
"Was that f---ing awesome or what! Right through your *hic* defense!" Lauren taunted. "Sorry, I think the *hic* cheering gave me the hiccups," she added.
"Serves you right!" Justin teased.
Lauren frowned, pretending to be upset.
"Do you want me to get you some water or something?" Justin suggested thoughtfully.
"Nah, *hmk* nothing stops my hiccups," she explained. "I get *hmk* them all the time." Justin would eventually learn just how big of an understatement that was!
Lauren's hiccups were quiet and breathy, just like her voice, so most of the time the only sign of them was the jerk that Justin could feel go through her, as they were squeezed so tightly together on the bleachers. Her hiccups were cute, but he didn't pay them much attention, as they were both now focused on the action on the field. Downtown High was forced to punt, but on the next possession, they forced an interception, and ran it back for a momentum-changing touchdown. Now it was Justin's turn to needle Lauren.
"We're *hic* coming back! We're gonna score the *hic* winning touchdown with *hmk* 47 seconds left." Lauren predicted confidently.
A short time later, with only a minute remaining in the game, with the same score, and Downtown High holding the ball, that didn't seem so likely. One yard was all that lay between Downtown and the game-clinching first down. Justin and his classmates were cheering wildly. Even Lauren was on her feet. Incredibly, the snap was fumbled, the home team recovered, and seconds later, as time expired, Western won the game on a long touchdown pass.
Justin and his classmates were in shock. Lauren couldn't have been more excited; she was almost intolerable! Still, the way she teased and mocked everyone from Downtown High, and Justin in particular, made it clear that she was a lot more comfortable with him than she had been only a couple hours before. Perhaps this would be the beginning of a lasting friendship.
"Tap on my window, knock on my door..."
Justin and Lauren swapped phone numbers that night after the football game, and as he was trying to grow his still-nascent social circle, Justin began to talk and hang out with Lauren occasionally. Although they had quickly become friends that first night, they weren't very close immediately. For the first few months after they first met, their phone conversations were relatively short and infrequent, consisting mainly of smalltalk, and they probably only saw each other two or three times. But as time passed, they clearly began to become closer - although Justin never did understand exactly why.
There really was very little they had in common. Justin was the calm, laid-back type, never bothered too much by anything, and rarely stressed or emotional. He was healthy, had a great family and a growing group of friends, and was an all-around nice guy. Lauren, on the other hand, was emotional, insecure, and somewhat unstable. She barely knew most of her very dysfunctional family - even at her relatively young age, she lived on her own - she was often sick, and had a hard time making and keeping friends. She could be almost impossible sometimes, and often got very depressed.
In short, Justin and Lauren could hardly have been more different in personality. But perhaps it was that very fact that strengthened their friendship: Lauren received some much-needed stability from Justin, who gave her someone she could depend on to give her some good counsel and cheer, or sometimes, just to listen to - and put up with - her troubles. Justin, for his part, appreciated how Lauren had befriended him even when he was still awkward and a little immature. And being the affable guy that he was, Justin wasn't as bothered by Lauren's darker side as many guys would have been, and he honestly wanted to make a positive difference in her troubled life. And Lauren certainly had her share of troubles.
"Comes back and makes me catch her every time she falls..."
"Hey Lauren, what's up? I haven't heard from you in a while," Justin greeted his friend after she answered his phone call. It had been about a year since they first met, and by that time they were good friends, although not as close as they would become.
The silence on the other end of the line, broken only by muffled hiccups and sobs, told him that something was very wrong. "What's wrong, Lauren?" he asked, concerned.
Finally she answered. "It's... it's Frankie." Frankie was Lauren's boyfriend; they had been together for as long as Justin had known her. There was another long pause before Lauren continued. "We, *hmk* we were driving and..." she began to cry again.
A shiver went down Justin's back, as he feared the worst. When Lauren calmed down a little, he started to ask, "Is he -"
Lauren interrupted, continuing the story. "He didn't see the car coming." She sniffled through a few more sobs. "He's barely... barely conscious; he doesn't even know me! Oh Justin..." she trailed off.
Although Lauren had escaped the accident with relatively minor injury, Frankie soon lapsed into a coma from which he never would awaken. It was on Justin's birthday, nearly a month after the accident, that Frankie breathed his last.
Through those dark days, Justin seemingly wasn't able to do a whole lot for Lauren, as she was away in another town with a larger hospital. But he was able to talk to her via text message a few times, and even though he felt like he wasn't really able to be of much help, it meant a lot to her. Just the fact that he thought to see how she was doing was a touching thing to her.
After that tragedy, Justin and Lauren clearly had become closer friends. When she finally had moved on enough to start dating again, Justin shared the happiness and excitement with her. He would always vividly remember the ecstatic look on her face when he told her about a chat he had rather unexpectedly had with her new love interest, a guy named Kevin, in which he admitted just how hopelessly in love he was with Lauren. And then when Kevin suddenly broke up with her because he apparently realized he "wasn't ready" for a serious relationship, Justin was the one who tried to convince her that she would be ok, to give her the courage to move on. Strangely, in all the tough situations Lauren got herself into, she almost never actually took Justin's advice - she'd drown her troubles in alcohol, she would cry endlessly, and be hopelessly depressed for weeks. There had even been a couple times when, in her depression, Justin had seemed to be the only person standing between her and suicide. And although she didn't express it often, his support of her, even when it felt undeserved, meant the world to her. When she did express her appreciation, Justin knew just how much she really meant it.
Every once in a while, they even traded roles. During a particularly difficult breakup of his own, Justin was able to turn to Lauren for support and encouragement. Yet despite their strong friendship and intermittently unstable love lives, they never seriously entertained the thought of being a couple themselves. Maybe it was because they came from such different worlds; but for whatever reason, they had a love for each other that was a lot like that of a brother and sister. They teased each other constantly, they could even be hopelessly annoying to each other at times, yet deep down they both always knew that the other wanted nothing but the best for them.
"I drove for miles and miles..."
By the beginning of Justin's senior year, he and Lauren talked practically every day, whether it was online, by text, on the phone, or visiting in person. It was amazing how despite both being rather quiet people, they were able to talk to each other as much as they did! Since Lauren shared an apartment just across town, but had no car, Justin went over to her place pretty often. They would watch TV, go out for a walk, attempt to do Sudoku puzzles, or just chat for a while. And usually, Lauren had the hiccups.
Lauren got the hiccups at least as much as Hannah, but was much more bothered by them than the carefree blonde could ever have imagined being. Getting hiccups so much, it wasn't that Lauren was particularly embarrassed by them; they simply annoyed her to no end. Indeed, at times it seemed to both her and Justin as if they really had no end. There were days when she would only have an hour or two without the hiccups. There had even been one time that Lauren had suffered through five straight days of hiccups, with the hiccups stopping only moments before a job interview! Justin found Lauren's relentless hiccups cute and not at all annoying, but he felt sorry for her when they would get especially bad, and attempted to help cure her numerous times, though almost always without success.
"I know I tend to get so insecure..."
When Juliana Davis and Justin began dating, she was quite unaware of his unusual, yet deep, friendship with Lauren. Then again, some girls would hardly have given Justin's relationship with Lauren a second thought anyway - perhaps they would have even had similar friendships of their own. But Juliana was different.
Juliana, not unlike Lauren, was a very sensitive girl. Her own family history was far from perfect, considering the indifference her father had shown to her for so long, and her mother's passing a year earlier. Even though things were much better between Juliana and her dad now, the emotional pain she had suffered through her childhood was still very real.
It wasn't only Juliana's childhood that continually haunted her. She was also dogged by a constant feeling of inferiority - a feeling that everything in her life seemed to feed. She was an attractive young lady, yet she felt inferior in beauty to more eye-catching girls. She was an excellent student, and worked hard at her studies. Yet she looked at the few in her class that, with seemingly no effort at all, did just as well as she did, and she felt like she wasn't nearly as smart as they were. In short, it seemed that there were always others who were more beautiful, more popular, more talented, more intelligent, or more wanted. It wasn't that Juliana considered herself stupid, ugly, or useless. She just wanted to be special; she wanted to stand out.
In the relationship realm, Juliana had always felt as if she was everyone's second or third choice; never the first. There had been one incident that had especially hurt her, when, after having been turned down by Hannah, a guy had proceeded to ask Juliana out, seemingly as a last resort, or perhaps even as a way to get to Hannah through her.
Yes, even Hannah, unquestionably Juliana's best friend, sometimes made her feel inferior. With her gorgeous appearance, gregarious nature, and broad circle of friends, Hannah was in some ways the perfect example of all that Juliana felt she was lacking. Juliana never resented Hannah for any of these things; she just felt more ordinary.
In many ways, Juliana was a bit like Lauren. Certainly she was less erratic and a whole lot easier to get along with, but many of the same struggles were there: struggles with insecurity, self-destructive emotions, difficult experiences, and traumatic losses. Indeed, perhaps from her similar, but more stable position, Juliana would have been able to help Lauren emotionally in a way that Justin never could.
But it was not to be.
"It's not always rainbows and butterflies..."
Early on in Justin and Juliana's relationship, Juliana was only faintly aware of Justin's friendship with Lauren. She knew Lauren was some girl that he was friends with, who seemed to text and call him a whole lot, but didn't really know much more. She actually looked forward to getting to meet this Lauren that she had heard about so often. Justin, on the other hand, felt some trepidation at the idea of Juliana and Lauren meeting one another. Although he could see how much potential there was for friendship between the two girls, he could also see how much conflict could erupt if they saw each other as threats, rather than friends. Because of that fear, he had tried to understate his friendship with Lauren; not denying it, but not always telling Juliana how often they talked or visited together. Lauren, for her part, understood that Justin's relationship would lessen the time that he could spend with her, but she clearly expected to be just as close with Justin as they had always been, even though a bit more of his time would be being spent with Juliana now.
The first time that Juliana and Lauren met served to confirm Justin's fears. He and Juliana had gone over to the place Lauren had recently moved into with her latest boyfriend, Matt. From the moment they walked through the door, Justin was increasingly certain that it was not going well. Lauren was feeling a little sick, and was thus even less welcoming and outgoing than usual, doing very little to make Juliana feel comfortable. Matt was there at first, and actually made a pretty good host; but he had to leave for his evening job just shortly after Justin and Juliana arrived. That left Lauren alone to entertain her guests.
Lauren provided a very adequate supper of pizza for the three of them, but the problem was not the food, it was the conversation. Lauren wasn't very comfortable with Juliana, having never met her before, and did a very poor job of making Juliana feel at home. Justin - the one whose job it really was to introduce the two girls and get them acquainted with each other - had feared this outcome from the start, yet was quite unprepared to prevent it. In fact, his fear of conflict between the two girls seemed to leave him frozen, unable to do what it would take to get them acquainted with each other in a positive way. Juliana had never been much of a socialite herself, and was thus just as unnerved by the situation as were Lauren and Justin. But Lauren and Justin were comfortable talking to each other, and so that is what the conversation quickly devolved into.
After the distraction of supper was gone, Justin and Lauren's failure to get Juliana involved became even more apparent. Some people would have simply interjected themselves into the conversation; but not Juliana. Although she was not antisocial, she also was not the type to jump into other people's conversations. Feeling distinctly left out, she resorted to the one convenient defense mechanism: she fell asleep.
With Juliana asleep, it was actually a lot easier for Justin and Lauren to relax and feel more natural. They just hung out for a while, intermittently watching TV and working on a Sudoku puzzle. It wasn't long at all before Lauren got a case of her notorious hiccups. Her hiccups, as usual, were quiet but very persistent. She mostly kept her mouth closed on them, so it often sounded like she was doing little more than inhaling sharply. When she talked, the hiccups were undeterred, but would usually just interrupt her words silently. It was only when she would have her mouth open that Justin could hear a small, cute little *hic* come out. She would apologize when one of those audible ones would come out, but she would smile at him, knowing full well that he had come to greatly enjoy her hiccups. Even the quiet hiccups bounced her body, though; the effect was especially noticeable on her stomach when she would lie back a bit. They chatted a little, and worked on the puzzle, until over two hours had passed, with Lauren hiccupping the entire time.
For the moment, things were much more comfortable for Justin, but he felt bad about making Juliana feel so left out. He also knew that she was not going to take this well; there was definitely going to be trouble over what had happened.
Juliana was indeed upset about how their evening had gone, and as Justin drove her home that night, she began to express her feelings about it.
"She made me feel completely unwelcome! It was like she resented my being there and wanted all of your attention for herself. And you were more than happy to give it to her!"
When Justin tried to assure her that Lauren didn't resent her, and that she didn't intend to treat her badly, Juliana was even more upset. "You should be on my side, not trying to stand up for her. I am your girlfriend, the one you say you love, not her! Why are you standing up for her instead of for me?"
Obviously, Justin was upset about the conflict between Juliana and himself about their first meeting with Lauren, but he believed they would be able to work through it. Eventually, Justin assured himself, Juliana and Lauren would come to understand each other, once they had gotten to know one another better. Then all would be well between the three of them. He failed to see that Juliana's problem with his friendship with Lauren went way beyond the surface issue: beyond her being sidelined one time at Lauren's house. Juliana didn't like at all how close Justin and Lauren were. She didn't like that he was such a close friend of another girl, and frankly, she didn't think it was right, because in her view, his bond with Lauren was a threat to their relationship. She believed that she should be the girl meeting his needs, not any other girl, and in addition, she feared that his having a close relationship with any other girl would serve as a temptation to him to break up with her should he find that there were ways in which the other girl, in this case Lauren, was better than Juliana herself. "I don't mind you being friends with other girls," she explained. "I just think it should be only casual. I've chosen to give up my close friendships with guys for you, why can't you do the same for me? What makes Lauren so much better than me? What does she do for you?"
It was a valid question. Justin wasn't emotionally dependent on Lauren, yet their friendship was nonetheless something special to him. "I can't explain it," he admitted. "I guess it's that even now that I have a lot of friends, she was like, one of the first. I don't see why she shouldn't still be; other guys don't suddenly lose all their friends that are girls when they start dating."
Clearly Justin wanted to retain his connection with Lauren. However, he already loved Juliana dearly, and he also recognized that as his girlfriend, his first responsibility was to her. She was an incredibly special girl and above all, he didn't want to hurt her or lose her. So ever the optimist, Justin made the mistake of hoping that he could work things out by simply lightening up on his relationship with Lauren for a while, until things got better between her and Juliana, and then they would understand each other and be able to make peace and all be friends. Looking back, he would realize that, regardless of whether he or Juliana was "right", he had focused too much on working out what he wanted, rather than truly understanding what Juliana felt she needed.
"Out on your corner in the pouring rain..."
Not only did Justin's hopes of maintaining both his relationship with Juliana and his friendship with Lauren neglect just how serious Juliana felt about his connection to another girl, but they also ignored another major problem with the situation: Lauren. Being a girl, and remarkably similar to Juliana in many ways, she had immediately recognized how Juliana felt, even while Justin, Juliana's own boyfriend, did not. Rather than trying to help make things better, she, in her own insecurity, came to view Juliana as a threat to one of her closest friendships. While before she had always supported Justin's relationship with Juliana, now she was antagonistic. When Justin began to cut down a bit on how much they talked and hung out together, hoping to satisfy Juliana, Lauren was not fooled. "We can't even talk on the phone like we used to; can't you see she's trying to ruin our friendship? She ought to respect your friendships, not try to break them down," Lauren argued. "She obviously doesn't trust you at all; that's not right. Plus, I'm with Matt; I'm not trying to hook up with you or something!"
Justin pleaded with Lauren to be patient with Juliana; he admitted that she was a little too insecure, but tried to assure Lauren that if she would just be a little more casual with him for a while, Juliana would get over her fears. But Lauren would have none of it. "I'm not gonna be just casual friends with you to make her happy," she said. "That's not what a friend is about. You are going to have to decide, either you're a real friend or you're not."
Lauren's demands were mirrored by Juliana's: if she was going to continue to be his girlfriend, he was going to have to be more exclusive with her, and he was not to be such close friends with Lauren as he had been. She was the one he was dating, not Lauren!
Even as he struggled through the bewildering situation, Justin was aware of the irony of the situation: each girl had come to hate each other because of the other's insecurity, yet all the while, each was being driven by her own insecurity. And although Justin wasn't insecure, he had acted selfishly, particularly to Juliana, rather than being caring and understanding. Now he was caught between the two girls. After trying so hard to avoid it, Justin had a choice to make.
"Please don't try so hard to say goodbye."
As a clock somewhere far away slowly chimed the hour of three, Justin tossed and turned sleeplessly in his bed. Thoughts of all that had happened made endless circles and spirals in his head. Stories about Lauren, Juliana, and himself played over and over: but not in a clear, comprehensible sequence. They all jumbled together, sometimes even overlapping like a radio stuck between stations. In one story, Lauren was the innocent victim of an obsessively jealous girlfriend. In another, sweet, tender Juliana was driven out of his life by a spiteful friend who expected far too much. Yet another told of a boy who had tried so hard to avoid a decision that he had completely missed any opportunity to make it. Strangely, they all seemed to be the same story.
In the confusing, combined story, that boy had decided to stay with Juliana, simply hoping that either she or Lauren would change, somehow. He could still hear Lauren's voice as she had answered his suggestion that they take a break from each other until he could work things out with Juliana - he could hear it as clearly as if she were still on the phone. She hadn't cried; she hadn't yelled at him; she hadn't even sounded angry.
"OK, but it's not going to be for just a while; if that's what you're gonna do, then this is goodbye forever," Lauren had declared, with far more bravado than she really felt. He had tried once more to change her mind, to explain everything for the hundredth time - and with a simple "Good bye, Justin," the phone had gone quiet.
Despite her unfeeling response to Justin on the phone, Lauren was in fact devastated by his decision. She locked herself in the bathroom for nearly a full twenty-four hours and would speak to no one, not even to Matt, who was naturally bewildered by the whole situation. She was angry - unspeakably angry at Juliana for taking away what she felt at the moment was her one true friendship. She was angry at Justin too, for making such a spineless decision. She was scared, as well. What if those suicidal thoughts that Justin had guided her away from should return once again, without him there to calm her? What if her relationship with Matt someday deteriorated? Would she be able to get through heartbreak alone this time?
Having gathered enough of the situation to figure out that Justin was involved, Matt sent him a text message from Lauren's phone, asking angrily what he had done to his girlfriend. So one last time, through a final round of texts, Justin tried to calm Lauren down, and get her to talk to Matt. She finally came out of the bathroom, although still very angry.
That night, Juliana found a scathing e-mail from Lauren in her inbox. Through the angry cursing, name-calling, and self-justifying, Juliana didn't so much see a girl who hated her passionately: even Lauren would have had to admit she had let her anger get carried away. Rather, Juliana saw Justin. He had made all this happen to her; he had sided with this girl who was now so filled with rage. He had even talked to her that very morning, rather than completely keeping his word. Juliana cried for a very long time. In yet another twist of the stories, she locked herself in the bathroom and cried for hours. Though her father tried his best to console her, there was nothing that could take away her pain.
In an outcome that might at first glance seem strange, Justin's belated decision did little to bring joy to Juliana. After all, he was only doing what he should have done far earlier. The problem still remained that he had placed Lauren above her until she had forced him to stop. Her trust in Justin was broken, and that was something that could have been rebuilt only in years, if ever.
As the stories circled on in Justin's head, they told how his relationship with Juliana had never been the same. It was clear that they had been torn apart. Before long, it was she that was saying "Goodbye forever." He started to fight it like he had fought to change Lauren's mind. But this time he gave up. He finally realized it was too late.
It had been more than a month now since his breakup with Juliana, and the drama between Juliana and Lauren was even further in the past. Yet the painful stories were particularly vivid in Justin's mind tonight. Earlier in the evening, he had finally mustered the courage to make that familiar drive to Lauren and Matt's apartment. A driving rain set the mood as he slowly trudged to her door and knocked. All was silent within for a moment, before he finally heard the quiet, high-pitched voice that was so familiar. "Coming," she called, unaware who stood outside.
The door opened, and Lauren appeared, rather shocked to see Justin. He looked into her eyes: those eyes still stood out in some unexplainable way. Her voice - it was the same as he had always known it. He could quickly tell that she even had the same hiccups that had afflicted her so many times over the years. Yet this was not the same girl he had left sobbing on her bathroom floor after that fateful phone call. She looked, sounded, and acted so much the same but yet, she was different.
Justin swallowed hard and tried to say something meaningful. "Lauren, I, uh, I just..."
"Hi Justin," Lauren interrupted his stammering. "I guess you're *hmk* here to say you're s- sorry; to tell me that you and Juliana br- broke up." It wasn't only hiccups that interrupted her words. There were quiet sobs, as tears were forming in those mysterious eyes of hers. "And I forgive you. I'm so - so sorry for my part, too. *hmk* I acted like such a bitch." The tears flowed faster now, but she continued. "But Justin, I've... well, I've moved on. You were an amazing friend, the best I've ever had, and I will remember you forever. But I can't..." Lauren nearly broke down, but finally regained a little composure. "I can't do it again. I loved you Justin; part of me always will. But it will never be the same. Never." Sobbing again, she embraced him in a long, tearful hug, which lasted several minutes. "I'm sorry, Justin," she finally whispered.
"I'm sorry too," he replied quietly, and with one final goodbye, he slowly trudged back to his car.
So the stories ended; Justin had wanted the best of both worlds, and had instead lost both his girlfriend and his closest friend. Yet though they were over, they continued to play round and round, through the long, silent night. Why did they always have to end with goodbye?